Last night my friend Anne and I began sponsoring a widow in Malawi. We had talked and prayed about sponsoring a child but when we saw the widows and understood their plight we decided to sponsor a widow instead...when I go to Malawi I will get to meet her!

Her name is Files Yohane. She is 70 years old and lives in the village on the outskirts of Esther's house where I am going. Her husband died from illness. She accepted Christ in 2010, so she is a new believer. There truly are no words to describe how I am feeling. People who know me know that I love to talk, but if there is anything I love more than talking, it's talking about Jesus! I can't wait to encourage her with the truth of God's word, to look into her eyes and tell her of His faithful love.

The beauty of beginning to sponsor her now is that Anne and I can write to her and send her pictures and encouragements from scripture. We can pray for her together. We can come along side her and actually disciple her to an extent from here. Anne is one of the women whom I disciple (how amazing to do this together!)...now we are supporting a widow in a culture that promises her nothing. But God's word promises us that He is our Husband, our provider, our strength and provision. How amazing that through technology, at the click of a button, we have already provided the money that Files will need to survive this month. Esther's house helps her with food, supplies and spiritual encouragement.

In our society there are many widows, new kinds of widows...there are single mothers, divorced parents, and spiritual widows whose spouses haven't taken on the role that God has commanded...they are left to fend for themselves. Our society promotes self objectification, but God set us into families for a reason. God's plan is for people to leave their parents for a different kind of love. Not everyone gets married, I understand, but everyone needs someone to love them, protect them, encourage them, support them, believe in them, provide for them...The Lord promises to be everything that we need:

"Father to the fatherless, defender of the widows - this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families; he sets the prisoners free and gives them joy." - Psalm 68:5-6

In a culture that does not honor family, in a place where narcissism runs rampant and the "me" mentality pervades every thought, word and direction that screams at us from the media...sadly, we have lost our way. Scripture reminds us what we were meant to have an abundant life. We yearn for peace. The world will tell you that admitting this need makes you weak...God says that it makes you strong, the world will say that you are the last, God will remind you that you are the first. We are well loved people, if only we knew it, if only someone bothered to share the truth of the gospel with you...if only some one would go...

"For I am jealous for you, I promised you as a pure bride to one husband - Christ." - Corinthians 11:2

From the beginning God has had different plans for us than we have had for ourselves. Only His plans will satisfy.Only His plans are perfect and Holy. Only His plans will provide eternal life. No matter what you try on your own, there will always be a place that is empty in your heart...this place is meant for Jesus your Husband.

"Is anyone thirsty? Come and drink- even if you have no money! Come, take your choice of wine or milk - it's all free!...I will make an everlasting covenant with you. I will give you all the unfailing love I promised David." - Isaiah 55:1,3

I have spent the last ten years or so discipling others. As a matter of fact when I began it was completely organic, I had never even heard of discipling. I had begun to mature in Christ and naturally started mentoring others. I was going to a church that did not encourage this biblical command. While still going to that church (it was the church that I had grown up in), I began to hear the gentle call to more...More turned out to be going to school for Spiritual Direction (another term no one at my church had ever heard of). A spiritual director is one who listens with a holy purpose  They create a place for God in some one's life, reflecting back to them the truths that rise to the surface and pointing out to them the movement and provision of the Lord. Many times people are oblivious to the hand of God. They see every occurrence in their lives as separate and disconnected. A spiritual director listens and points...listens and points. (We don't really direct anything)...God does the directing. (The title is confusing, I personally don't like it for that reason)...Anyway, as it turns out Spiritual Direction and discipling are exactly the same thing. When you disciple someone you pour into them...you help them understand biblical truths and how to apply them to their lives. As a mentor you show them, through your example, how to live a Godly life. You pray for them and their families. You listen with love. You point to God's character and His provision. You challenge them to be obedient to His ways.

About three and a half years ago, I moved to a new church in our area. They were focused on discipleship and went through the Bible on Sundays verse by verse. As soon as I got there, it was obvious that this was my new church home. I was suddenly not the "crazy lady" who wanted to talk about Jesus all of the time. I was not the only one who would pray out loud. I was not the only one who felt compelled to lift my hands while praising God....I was HOME!

Keystone Community Fellowship was exactly what I had been looking for. They had a system in place called the journey, which consisted of several books and retreats as resources for working with people in disciplship. From the moment I arrived, God just started bringing people to me to work with. Each of these ladies have become like sisters to me. I have had a deep connection with each person. God has hand picked every relationship.

Discipling takes up a lot of my time. I currently work with two women at once. Between actually meeting every week, praying for them and their families, and preparing for our time together, it takes up most of my week. Every minute is well worth spending though..I have had the privilege of seeing 4 of them baptized. I have seen them grow and strengthen and begin their own ministries. It is kind of like being a mother watching a child with love. As they grow up and begin to disciple others, I have become connected to such a large family of believers. In the body of Christ, I am well blessed.

This is the church that is sending me and my team to Malawi. I have had the experience of working with so many here that I am prepared now to move out into all the world.

God works in mysterious ways sometimes...sometimes he is just training you up for His work. We often don't know what we are training for until it comes, but with hindsight are able to see the intricate weavings of our Master.

Jesus said that we need to have an attitude of using all of our life for His kingdom. We were all bought at a cost.

"And if you do not carry your own cross and follow me, you can not be my disciple. But dont begin until you count the cost....You cannot become my disciple without giving up everything you own." - Luke 27-28,33

I gladly give everything to You Lord...take it all and use it for Your Glory!

I have had such a busy few days...but here I am again, finally. I have been challenging myself to try to write every day but the things which have been occupying my time were all good. That is the theme for the day; whatever is good...that is what we should be concentrating on. In a world filled with bad things, we must remember why the world is broken.(it was because of man). It is easy to forget that when God created our world He said that it was good...that we were good. When Adam and Eve chose disobedience over trust everything changed.

Phlippians 4:8 reminds me that there is still goodness...our defiance was not able to change a thing about our Creator. He is good. Our society has dumbed down many words and unfortunately good is one of them. We use it to describe our feelings, the weather, or a slice of pizza that we have just eaten. When God declared everything that He had created as good, He was declaring it as perfect in every way.

I know it is difficult to look around and find good some days...when I am having trouble all I have to do is take a look at God's character, and remember that Jesus chose to come to the earth to die to save me. There are reminders every time a baby laughs or a warm breeze brushes through you hair.... when birds are chirping on a sunny spring morning and when puppies and kittens roll and tumble, fluffy with new life. There are beautiful colors and endless varieties of every plant and living creature. There are majestic mountains and glorious oceans and cannons filled with the beauty of layered time. There is goodness found when a stranger helps you for no apparent reason and when a mother nurtures her child, when a daughter cares for her aging mother or a toddler learns to sing. There is goodness in music and dancing and painting, in language and hearing....there is goodness abounding if only we will look for it. Today I challenge you to look for the good things, and then thank the one who made them. Our Father is good, and everything that he has made is good.

"O Lord how great you are! You are robed with honor and majesty. You are dressed in a robe of light. You stretch out the starry curtain of the heavens; you lay the rafters of your home in the rain clouds. You make the clouds your chariot; you ride upon the wind. You placed the world on its foundation so it would never be moved. You clothed the earth with floods of water, water that covered the mountains. At your command the water fled; at the sound of your thunder, it hurried away. Mountains rose and valleys sank to the levels you decreed...The Lord takes pleasure in all that he has made!...Let all that I am praise the Lord!" - Psalm104:1-8,32,35

It is up to you what you decide to look at today, and also up to you whether you thank the one who created it. Have a good day.

"You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born Every day of my life was recorded in Your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed." - Psalm 139:15-16

Today is my daughter Lauren's birthday! As I consider the amazing woman that she has become, I remain thankful to the one who knew from the moment that he created her, who she would be. Lauren is a woman of noble character. She is everything that I want to be. My life is blessed by her presence.

One of the best things about my daughter and my relationship is the respect that we have for one another. Aside from the many things we have in common (we have literally bought the same clothing, shoes, jewelry... and then each come out of our rooms to go somewhere wearing the same thing at the same time! ... then we have to awkwardly decide who gets to wear whatever it is so that we don't look like we planned to be twins) We like the same music, the same foods, the same scriptures, the same people...we even laugh at the same very silly things. God knew exactly what He was doing, and I am forever grateful.

As I have had the pleasure to watch Lauren grow up and mature, It has been most wonderful to see her faith blossom and bear much fruit. Wherever Lauren goes she takes the Lord with her. Literally her car is filled with scriptures printed out on cards and placed strategically where she can see them to be reminded of how the Father wants us to live.

She is working as a social worker in the intensive reunification unit within a Christian supplemental organization and plans to begin her graduate work in Christian counseling at Philadelphia Biblical University this summer. To say that I am proud just does not even begin to express my feelings.

You might wonder what this could possibly have to do with my trip to Malawi...Well, one of the best stories about my trip to Malawi includes this fine young lady. You see about a month before the first mission meeting for the Malawi trip, our church began showing short videos at the end of services describing the up coming trip. Lauren and I sat next to each other week after week, each talking personally with God about the trip. As the weeks went by and the first meeting drew near I began to know without doubt that God was calling me to go to Malawi. A day before the meeting, Lauren asked to talk with me. She seemed pretty serious. "Mom" she said, "I don't want you to be worried, but, I am feeling called to go on the mission trip to Malawi this summer." I was so excited to tell her that I had also been feeling called to go. We decided to go to the meeting together :) Driving to the church office we shared our separate calls and couldn't help but smile.

One of the greatest things about this trip is my being able to share the experience with Lauren. Like I said, we are alike in many ways...but we are just different enough to make it interesting and fun to be around each other. God knows what He is doing...everything that He does is good.

Lauren and I both came to Christ together. Every year we celebrate our born again date in some special way. This year will be 11 years for us in Christ (a long story, but 11 is a very important number between  God and I) and we can't help but believe that He engineered our going on this trip as a commemoration of that time for us to celebrate and be thankful.

I am forever amazed at what God weaves together...the intricacy of His purposes for different lives ...families...churches and nations....He is making a masterpiece out of us if we will only let Him. Thank you Lord for loving me, and giving me such a special gift as Lauren!

Today I read a story from the gospel of Asia. In it, missionaries were showing the Jesus film to villagers who had never seen a movie before. For these people the movie became indistinguishable from real life as they followed the storyline of Jesus' time here on earth. One man who was an alcoholic most of his life came to see the movie. As he watched and began to understand who Jesus was and what he had done for him, his heart softened. When on the screen, the Roman soldiers began to nail Jesus to the cross, this man stood up shouting "Stop...Stop...Stop!"
...you see he had become so engrossed in the movie that he felt as if the moment was real...he had come to understand who Jesus was and why he had come. He knew that Jesus didn't deserve to die on the cross.

 The missionaries took him aside and talked with him.One of the missionaries had also been an alcoholic for many years. He explained how Jesus had set him free. The man accepted Jesus as his Lord and Savior right then and there and was freed from alcoholism as well. Strange that a man half way around the world, who had never heard of Jesus before, had been so moved that his entire life changed just because he had heard the truth. Just the truth is enough for everyone. But not everyone has heard the truth. Whether it is someone else or me myself who takes the good news to those without hope does not matter, so long as it goes and it goes swiftly!

This summer I will have the chance to speak with people who have never heard of Jesus. I will convey to them the story of why he came to earth and why he died for them...why he died for me. Whether in Malawi Africa, or here in my own neighborhood, even at times, to be honest, here in my own church, when I take the truth to those who have not heard it I am the one who is blessed. Jesus will endure, His truth will remain, no matter who refutes its validity, it is after all, still the truth. I believe that this mission trip will teach me many things, and I am certain that it will enlarge the territory of my ministry.

I once prayed "Lord, let me reach multitudes for your kingdom" I believe that God not only heard that prayer, but has been granting  me the opportunity. Every day there is seed to be sewn, there are people to be loved, there is justice to be done...every day is chock full of opportunities to do the right thing, for the right reason, at the right time.

This life is fleeting to say the least. My purpose here has been stated simply but powerfully by my Lord:

"Therefore GO and MAKE DISCIPLES of ALL nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of  the Holy Spirit, and TEACHING them to OBEY EVERYTHING I have commanded you." - Mathew 28:19-20

This was the last thing that Jesus said to the disciples. There were only eleven of them remaining. "When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted." ...Wow, even then, even with the resurrected Jesus standing in front of them giving them his departing words, even after worshiping, some doubted...I know it is difficult sometimes for us to hold on to the truth of Jesus, but the very last thing he says in Mathew 28:20 is "And I will be with you always, to the very end of the age."

As for me, I choose to believe!

Today I made a friend on Facebook who lives in Lilongwe Malawi. He grew up in Ntcheu Malawi. He went to Grad School in Tsabango...But the best thing is; he loves the Lord! I have asked him to help me with some cultural questions and also asked about the plight of the widows and orphans that I will be ministering to. What a blessing to have someone to explain first hand what the atmosphere of the region I will be going to is really like.

I had been praying for understanding, for focus, and for wisdom regarding the mission trip. And here was this man half way around the world who is able to answer my questions. He began by welcoming me to Malawi!(No wonder it is known as the "warm heart of Africa") I have already had so many questions answered and he is going to help me a bit with the language. God often provides answers in creative and unexpected ways.

What I am finding as I prayerfully consider any aspect of this trip is God's complete and perfect provision. Two days ago I shared with you how God had provided healing in a foundational area of my life, yesterday he reminded me about His protection, and His plans for my life. Today He grants me connection with a believer in the actual country where I will be going for him! God is the God of answers. He is the God of details. He is the God of fellowship. He is the God of love.

As I continue in the process of agreeing with God about going on this trip...as I yield my heart to Him completely...as I trust in His perfect provision for finances, resources and wisdom...He provides. As my heart relays it's willingness to share with others cheerfully, God assures me in His word that he will take care of my needs. As I depend on His Spirit to move the hearts of those who will help me in this endeavor, I strengthen at the thought of the inclusiveness of His ways. God wants all of us to benefit from giving and sharing the only thing of any real value: Jesus, His son.

"Remember this - a farmer who plants only a few seeds will get a small crop. But the one who plants generously will get a generous crop. You must each decide in your heart how much to give. And don't give reluctantly or in response to pressure. 'For God loves a person who gives cheerfully.' And God will generously provide all you need. Then you will always have everything you need and plenty left over to share with others. as the scriptures says, 'They give freely and share generously to the poor. Their good deeds will be remembered forever.' For God is the one who provides seed for the farmer and then bread to eat. In the same way, He will provide and increase your resources and then produce a great harvest of generosity in you. Yes you will be enriched in every way so that you can always be generous. And when we take your gifts to those who need them, they will thank God."

After all...the reason for this trip to Malawi is for Christ to be shared, and God to be thanked! AMEN!

The struggle between good and evil, the corruption of our very own hearts coupled with the twisted pointing finger of the accuser can lead to confusion, discouragement and destruction.

"Search me ,O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life."
- Psalm 139:23-24

When I had been a christian for only a few moments, the enemy was already trying to twist the truth about who I was and what I was here to do. Let me assure you, God has a plan for your life. "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." -Jeremiah 29:11...but so does the enemy "The angel showed me Joshua standing before the angel of the Lord. The accuser, Satan, was there at the angel's right hand making accusations against Joshua. And the Lord said to Satan 'I, the Lord reject your accusations, Satan. Yes, the Lord who has chosen Jerusalem, rebukes you. This man is like a burning stick that has been snatched from the fire'."- Zechariah 3:1-2 The Lord snatches us from death through our acknowledgement of who Jesus is and what he has done for us. The accuser seeks to challenge the promises of God and our responses throughout the bible. He causes Eve to question God's provision...He puts Job through loss after loss, he points, he asks, he slithers...he wants anything for your life other than what God has planned. He is after God's glory and if he can't get it for himself, then he wants you so focused on worldly pursuits that you won't give God glory either.

If left to God Eve's plan was for perfect relationship. If not challenged by Satan, Job would have continued to live in abundance with a great hedge of protection from the Lord.

What the enemy does not count on when he tries to get us to step away from the good plan God has for our lives, is that the WORD of God. It will keep us in perfect safety...it will guide us and warn us and speak God's love and truth into our hearts.

If you are trying to journey through this life without the word of God as your compass, you will walk in the plans of the enemy. If you test everything against the backdrop of Jesus...if you employee His marvelous Spirit to point out the corruption in your heart and are committed to deal with what offends the Lord, then you will have the future and the hope God intended to bless you with while still here on earth.

This is not my home...I am an alien here obeying the example of my King, my Master, My Lord...If left to my own musings I am helpless to the attack of my own falleness and to the accusations of the enemy of my soul. But the Lord has provided protection and direction...no one needs to live a worthless life.

"Be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on all of God's armor so that you will be able to stand firm against all of the strategies of the devil. For we are not fighting against flesh and blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world." - Ephesians 6:10-12

Go take a look at Ephesians 6:13-18 and read about the perfect armor that God has provided for our protection...He does not leave us helpless.

Thank you Lord...today as I prepare for whatever you have planned for my life, I will stand in the truth that it is for good, for a future and for a hope. Thank you for snatching me from the fire. Guide me with your Holy Spirit and use me mightily for your kingdom!

"We love each other because He loved us first." - 1Peter 4:19

Today I choose to focus on love! Yesterday I spent a good part of my day working on relationships...I began of course by spending time with God, but I felt the need to invest in the fundamental relationships in my life. I went to my parents house and brought with me an excellent talk from Elijiah House, about honoring your mother and father and rebellion. I had been given this cd more than a year ago during a time in which God seemed to be pointing out my quiet rebellions...the subtle sins which had been sewn into the fabric of my character from childhood. These childhood strongholds had become integrated into the root system of my personality. During a time in which I didn't truly understand the world, God, or even myself...all of my opinions had been  formed.

I asked my parents to listen to this cd with me...and after opening our time with prayer, we sat together with eyes closed and hearts open. What was amazing to me was the immediate sense of fellowship...here we were united at the table, the very same table where many of my rebellions had taken root. But we were now, years later, sitting together in Christ, agreeing to dig into the soils of our hearts and pull up the roots which had been trying to strangle our love for one another. The enemy and the world had sown weeds and thorn bushes which had been choking our family unity.

In just a little over two hours, we listened, we talked...we cleared the gardens of our hearts, we pulled weeds, cleared brush, cast away stones and tilled the ground. In just one morning God had unified what had been separated...He had healed what had been broken...He had covered our sins with His love. 

This is what God does...He is always making something new. The key to all of this goodness was actually listening to the guidance of the Holy Spirit...allowing myself to dare to believe that my stepping out in love would make a difference.

I cannot explain what happened yesterday, but years of misunderstanding and hurt are gone.

Thank you Lord for loving us so that we can love in return.

You may wonder what this has to do with my trip to Malawi...I would say "everything"...I don't want to miss any opportunities to minister when I am there, I have been praying for the Lord to strengthen me and my witness...Yesterday He answered that prayer in a way I could never have imagined.

I know I have been  A.W.A.L.for a few days, but I have had some difficulty keeping up with all of the preparations for the trip, my family life, discipling the two lovely ladies I am working with, and trying to reign in my testimony to a mere three hundred words. So here I am at last, sitting at my kitchen table with my coffee, my bible, my journal and my laptop. My original intention was to journal during my morning worship and quiet time and blog in the afternoon or evening...the problem has been that when I wait to blog, I am either too busy, or I fall asleep. I have become a morning person (yes one of those!) through a series of life changing events; motherhood,aging, and illness. Trust me, in my heart, getting up at 5am every day is not a good idea, in my heart I have a temper tantrum at the thought of wrestling open my eyes before the sun is up, but, alas, in my reality, it is the only time that I can get away by myself to spend with the Lord. It started years ago when the kids were younger, I would steal away to the kitchen, open my bible and my journal and have my time with God. Don't get me wrong, I talk with God throughout the day. I listen to worship music in the car and praise Him at the top of my lungs (I try to remember not to close my eyes while I am driving)  I speak scripture into every conversation that I can, and I do ministry for a living...but that morning time with Jesus...cannot be adequately conveyed. I sit, as Mary did, at His feet...I tell him my deepest sorrows, He brushes them away with a kiss of His word, I worship him barefoot in His presence and lift prayers of praise as incense before His throne...we dance, we wrestle, we argue, we listen,we laugh, we cry...WE LOVE. It is our special time alone together before the world invades. He encourages me with His word and whispers wisdom into my life, guiding me always with His spirit in truth and mercy. His grace IS sufficient for me...He IS all I need.

In many situations in my life at the moment, the lesson seems to be the same: "Trust Me". Change is good, it means that we are alive, but change has it's pains and it's awkward moments until the new settles in and becomes the now. I am excited about the changes that are happening in my life, but the stretching pains are uncomfortable. We would always rather be in "In Egypt"...the past is so easy to glorify,we forget the injustices and the captivity and remember only the "leeks and the garlic"...for those reading this that have no idea what I am referring to, the quoted thoughts are from the bible, when the Israelites were in the dessert, having left the slavery of the Egyptians...Even though God had provided them perfect food from heaven, they yearned for the foods they had eaten in Egypt. Instead of being thankful for their freedom, they longed for their captivity, having romanticized it over time. We do that too...refusing to see the obvious lack and burden in certain relationships and situations in our lives. We choose to see what we perceive as the good, and gloss over the prison bars that we look through. In Christ we can break free, from even the habit of longing for "Egypt"... What we need to keep fresh in our minds is the truth that "The thief's purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life" (John 10:10) What we long for needs to be obedience to Christ, in His ways are abundant life. The world, which is governed by the enemy, wants to convince us that there is richness and satisfaction in anything other than Jesus. The world is ruled by a liar and cannot speak any other language. It is up to us to know who speaks the truth, and to choose the truth, even if we are in the desert...even when it looks like lack...believing that if  God is with us, we are exactly where we need to be.

If you remember anything that I have said, please remember this:" Love never fails". Loving God never fails to bring Him by your side. Praise Him continually...for praise works faith, and "God inhabits the praise of His people". As I prepare to go to Malawi I take comfort in knowing that He is sending me to tell the widows and the orphans who He is. He is:

"Father to the fatherless, defender of widows...God places the lonely in families; He sets the prisoners free and gives them joy." - Psalm 68:5-6

"Come let us worship and bow down, let us bow our lives in worship before God." - Psalm 95:6

Jesus gave everything...What can I give in return? I have nothing worthy to to give. If I give all of my possessions it will not be enough. If I give my talents, my service, and all of my time, it will not be enough. what can I possibly give?...My life, I can give my life. I can bow everything before him as an act of worship.

"Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship." - Romans 12:1

Alas, it has been a long day...I am ready for bed and ready to serve another day. Jesus you bought me at a price, spend me however best serves your kingdom...good night.

Today my Passport Arrived!

Last night I spent an hour or so putting together a letter to my prayer team. Pure Mission has been  great with suggesting multiple areas for prayer coverage...Although I think I have thought of everything, I trust my team to follow the Holy Spirit's leading. After all He knows best what I will need.

I applied for my passport less than two weeks ago and was thoroughly surprised that it arrived today! That is so like God...two days ago while I was praying I found myself questioning my call to go to Africa for just a moment (even though I am certain I am supposed to go) sometimes a thought runs through my head that maybe I heard wrong, maybe I am somehow listening to my own voice and not the Lord's...I said something like "if I definitely am supposed to go let me get my passport right away Lord". It typically takes 4-6 weeks for a passport to arrive, mine came 12 days after

I had applied. Thank you Father that even when I question you, you are trustworthy. Just as you knew that Thomas needed to see you and touch your scars, sometimes when our faith waivers, we need you to show us something tangible...we need to know that what You have said is real for us to continue on.

I am thankful for your compassionate nudgings and all of the ways you have guided my spirit in this calling.

"The Lord always keeps His promises; He is gracious in all He does. The Lord helps the fallen and lifts those bent beneath their Loads." - Psalm 145:13

It has been an emotional roller coaster preparing for this trip. Fund raising has been a disappointment in so many ways. Everything I have expected has been turned upside down. The only thing that I am certain of right now is that God is trust worthy, that when He calls a servant and they answer with  "yes, I will go for you", that He will make a way. No matter what things "look like", I will trust in Your voice Lord, which my heart has most certainly heard. I am thankful for the mercy of this little sign in answer to my momentary doubt. Lord You are so gracious to me!

He Is Risen!

Today is Resurrection Day and I am, as always, overwhelmed. The thought that Jesus, the perfect and Holy Son of God came here to earth, chose to be contained in a human body...suffer the frustration of our insolence...endure the cross...die for me... all for me, makes me breathless - just absolutely undone!

So today I will praise You Lord, I will sing with everything I have of Your greatness, Your majesty, Your grace, Your perfect Holy love.

"Happy are those who hear the joyful call to worship., for they walk in the light of your presence, Lord. They rejoice all day long in your wonderful reputation. They exult in your righteousness. You are their glorious strength. It pleases you to make us strong. Yes our protection comes from the Lord, and he the Holy one, has given us our king." - Psalm 89:15-18

Today is good Friday. Does anything else really matter? As I poured over the word this morning I heard the whisper of God's guidance tell me to anticipate my victories...to claim them in the name of Jesus. I read on to find that a battle requires preparation, ample ammunition and intensive training. My trip to Malawi is in many ways a battle. It is amazing to me how people have reacted to my plans to go. Those whom I expected to be encouraging were not. From those whom I expected nothing, I was suddenly receiving unexpected support. So many asked why would I want to go somewhere with no running water or electricity, others expressed fears and concerns about my safety. The best I can do to explain is that I have a distinct peace about this trip...I have from the start...that's just a gift from the Lord that I am not planning to give back. Although there is still so much preparing to do, I am excited about digging in my heels and getting started. One of the biggest tasks I need to address is fine tuning my testimony. I have told my testimony numerous times, but never in this Malawian culture with completely different social ques. Never before would I be sharing my story with an interpreter by my side. Never before  would I fumble for the few words that I  had managed to memorize in a foreign language. Never before in a country so different from mine. What I do know is that my part in all of this is to be a vessel set apart for whatever use my Father in heaven has in mind. I cannot prepare in any better way than by sitting at the feet of my Lord, focused on his word and determined to carry out his good and pleasing will.  Praise is the voice of faith and so I choose to praise you and most of all to trust you Lord.

"The song of praise is made of the very fabric of things hoped for. It becomes evidence of unseen things. It is the raw material in my hands from which I fashion your victories.' - Frances J. Roberts

This is the main photo on the Pure mission site

Today my picture and biography went up on the Pure mission web-site. I managed to share it on Face Book and now am going to link it to the blog (I hope)...


www.puremission.org/give/send-a-servant

just click on the sight above, search for me :)  and if you feel generous, you can donate by credit card right there and then!!! super easy and better yet, tax deductible :) I am amazed how much I have gotten done since Sunday's mission meeting. I also figured out how to follow the blogs of people at the orphanage I am going to...so cool to see the pictures of where I am going and to hear their prayer requests and their stories...This trip has become a ministry in each of their lives...

Ezekiel 15 - the Israelites are like vines among trees -" a vine's wood has no strength size or beauty, it's not even good for fuel, it burns too quickly. If grapevines grow among the trees of the forest, they don't produce fruit because they lack sufficient light." Apathetic and unfruitful...spiritual apathy? Am I wood that can be used to make things? If thrown into the fire, am I even good fuel? So, if the vines that grow in the forest don not bear fruit because they don't get enough light...are the trees the world? The world is big, thick with things, - it keeps us from getting the light - we don't bear fruit - not useful - ugh!

Why do we make idols of anything? We were wired from creation to worship so if we aren't worshiping God, we worship something else...(celebrities, football players, mansions, money, prestige...) replacing the space meant for worshiping God

Psalm 145:16 "When you open your hand, you satisfy the the hunger and thirst of every living thing"

In order to do their jobs, our testimonies must be carefully filtered of subtle and sometimes accidental self glorifications...we never stand taller, than when we bow down to lift God up...Working on my testimony for Malawi...help me Lord to glorify You!

"Heaven and earth are full of your glory, My soul it overflows full of your glory, Oh blessed is he who reigns, full of your glory, my cup it can't contain all of your glory, Hosanna we are found, after all you are Holy..."-David Crowder Band

Ecc 11:4... "Farmers who wait for perfect weather never plant. If they watch every cloud, they never harvest. Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother's womb, so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things. Plant your seed in the morning and keep busy all afternoon, for you don't know if profit will come from one activity or another - or maybe both."

"It's my timing Amanda" - God

There is so much to do. I have written and sent a fund raising letter for the trip (Also invited some friends on a FB event)...applied for my passport...made my shot appointments(EEEK) and set up this blog. Sunday was a skype meeting with Pure Mission at our church office. Yesterday I wrote a non refundable check for my deposit on the trip...I got a back round check and took child safety training. Today I assembled my prayer team, put my biography and picture on the Pure Mission web site, and linked my blog to my face book account...Whew, that's a lot of technology for an old person! 

My goal for this blog is to start sharing how I prepare for this trip, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I hope to keep blogging here, there, and after my return. I will reveal parts of my quiet times with God...share scriptures, funnies, frustrations, questions, hopes, dreams...you get the idea...you will be privy to it all in its most likely messy glory. I journal every day so I guess this is just like showing my journal to a few (or 100's) of my closest friends...we will see what happens...It's going to be great! I am ready...